im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
