Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
