i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
