Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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