I just made out with a guy for $7.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
