I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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