I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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