Christians are straight up FREAKS
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize