I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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