um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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