Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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