my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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