Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Randomize
