please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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