Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
