in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
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