so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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