i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize