It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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