i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I supernannyed him into submission
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
