Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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