My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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