It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
