I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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