You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
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