In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
