508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
