Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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