my shit smells like andre
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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