Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
