Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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