bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
so much tequila, so little girl.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
