that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Randomize