Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
