You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
