is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
