My hair reeks of homosexuality.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
the room spins SO much faster in panama
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I need water and some morals
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