Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Randomize
