i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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