would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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