he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize