Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize