The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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