mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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