cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Randomize
