There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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