I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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