My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
and she was petting her beer can
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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