His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Green mimosas i think yes
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
