Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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