You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
