Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize