We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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