butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
